New Years Reflection 12-31-11

This whole last year was clouded with I high I never could escape till I came here. New years eve last year I was so out of my mid I was shaking and barely knew what I was doin or wher I was. This past year had had only one real high- which was coming to Rainrock and finally escaping the thing that had me in such a strong hold. I am so embarressed of what I did, how much i lied, and how I treated my family and friends. It makes me sick to think of all that I did. I basically see see it as a year that I lost. A year that I will never get back- ever. I hope this year isnt what defines me but changes me into the person that I know resides deep down inside of me. That is what hurt the most, I know this past year-- i was gone-lost to the days of my Ed. I was simply trying to suffer and now I am because it sucks what I have done to myself and that I stole a whole year, 365 days from family, friends and myself.