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Monday, January 30, 2012
12/22/11
I have realized that I have a lot of resentment and hurt feelings from the fact that I have felt like I've had to be self sufficient and by myself for a long time. I feel that there has never been or in the past there was never anyone there to provide me with what I need. I dont want to blame anyone- but I am still mad that no one I know has to make hard decisions based on money, that others have parents who are able to meet their needs. In a way it transates to me, in my mind, asa lack of care, because if someone really cared and love me they would find a way to help me. In the back of my mind I know that connection is a poor one. Still, I cannot separate it. This is al;so a big reason I feel I have never felt taken care of. Its hard and frustrating because I dont want anyone to think I am blaming them but I dont know what to do with my feelings.
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